Saturday, 31 August 2019

How to know whether your “Good” Friends

ARE ACTUALLY TOXIC FRIENDS

Being together with a supportive friend is good for your health – mental and emotional alike. Garnering positive social support from these friends are important as you would want to know who’s there to break your fall, or be there when you meet an unfortunate encounter and not just shun you when life gets hard.

Unfortunately, we will always bump into a couple of such “friends” in our life, and we often might not realise how detrimental they are to our well-being until things turn ugly and you realise that you were wrong about them all along.

Even though we agree that there are no hard and fast rules of determining such friends. there are some signs that you can look out for and have “the talk” before it becomes too late to salvage the friendship.
  • You are frenemies
  • They can’t see their own flaws
  • They are negative
  • They are unsupportive
  • They are selfish
  • They betray your trust
  • They are a bad influence
  • You dread seeing them

read more

related:

Friday, 30 August 2019

The world’s most-surveilled cities

Singapore – 86,000 cameras for 5,638,676 people = 15.25 cameras per 1,000 people

Cities in China are under the heaviest CCTV surveillance in the world, according to a new analysis by Comparitech. However, some residents living in cities across the US, UK, UAE, Australia, and India will also find themselves surrounded by a large number of watchful eyes, as our look at the number of public CCTV cameras in 120 cities worldwide found.

Closed-circuit television (CCTV) cameras serve many purposes, ranging from crime prevention to traffic monitoring to observing industrial operations in environments not suitable for humans. The digital age has boosted the prevalence of CCTV surveillance. Cameras are getting better and cheaper, while live video streams can be remotely accessed, stored on the internet, and passed around. The adoption of face recognition technology makes it possible for both public and private entities to instantly check the identity of anyone who passes by a CCTV camera.

Depending on whom you ask, the increased prevalence and capabilities of CCTV surveillance could make society safer and more efficient, could trample on our rights to privacy and freedom of movement, or both. No matter which side you argue, the fact is that live video surveillance is ramping up worldwide.

read more

Singapore is the 11th most-surveilled city in the world – but it doesn’t even come close to China
Singapore ranked at 11th place on the global list, making it the third-most surveilled city outside of China. The Straits Times

Ever felt like someone was watching you? If you live in China, there’s good reason to feel that way.

According to a study by UK consumer comparison website Comparitech, Chinese cities are under the heaviest CCTV surveillance in the world, making up eight out of the top 10 most-surveilled cities globally.

At the top of the ranking released on Thursday (August 15) was Chongqing, which Comparitech said had over 2.5 million cameras for 15.3 million people. That works out to be around 168.03 cameras per 1,000 people, Comparitech said.

read more

Singapore is the 3rd most-surveilled city outside of China, says report
The Singapore police force install security cameras in public areas in and around the island. (Image by Dinoman / Shutterstock)

Singapore is the 11th most-surveilled city in the world, according to UK comparison website Comparitech, and 3rd most-surveilled outside of China. According to the rankings released by Comparitech on 15 August based on a study of 120 cities, Chinese cities have some of the highest number of CCTV cameras per person.

In Singapore, Comparitech notes there are about 15.25 cameras per 1,000 people. Following closely was Abu Dhabi (12th place), Chicago (13th place), and Sydney (15th place) with 13.77, 13.05, and 12.35 cameras per 1,000 people respectively.

Even so, those numbers are much smaller compared to the numbers in Chinese cities which make up 8 out of the top 10 most-surveilled cities around the globe.

read more

Singapore to test facial recognition on lampposts, stoking privacy fears
SenseTime surveillance software identifying details about people and vehicles runs as a demonstration at the company's office in Beijing, China, October 11, 2017. REUTERS/Thomas Peter/File Photo

In the not too distant future, surveillance cameras sitting atop over 100,000 lampposts in Singapore could help authorities pick out and recognize faces in crowds across the island-state.

The plan to install the cameras, which will be linked to facial recognition software, is raising privacy fears among security experts and rights groups. The government said the system would allow it to “perform crowd analytics” and support anti-terror operations.

GovTech, the Singapore government agency in charge of a “Lamppost-as-a-Platform” pilot project scheduled to begin next year, has given companies until May to register their interest in providing technology for the network.

read more

'Smart lamp posts' in Singapore won't shine light into people's lives

Some aspects of the "smart lampposts" have sparked concerns about privacy, especially the platform’s prospective ability to recognise faces

In an exclusive interview with Channel NewsAsia, Smart Nation and Digital Government Office Deputy Secretary Tan Kok Yam tells Ahmad Khan that the aim of smart lamp posts is strictly to improve urban planning and operations.

An ambitious project is underway to equip lamp posts in Singapore with various capabilities to improve urban planning - serving to be more than just a light source. A trial by the Smart Nation and Digital Government Office (SNDGO) and the Government Technology Agency (GovTech) will start next year in Geylang and One-North.

This is part of Singapore’s Smart Nation Sensor Platform project, which could see all of Singapore’s 110,000 lamp posts fitted with a network of wireless sensors, to transform them into "smart lamp posts". 

read more

Singapore to pilot smart city facial recognition project

Singapore government agency GovTech is planning to perform crowd analytics with facial analysis from a “Lamppost-as-a-Platform” (LaaP) pilot project, Reuters reports.

“As part of the LaaP trial, we are testing out various kinds of sensors on the lampposts, including cameras that can support backend facial recognition capabilities,” a GovTech spokesperson told Reuters in an email. Singapore’s Prime Minister Lee Hsien Loong said last week he did not want the project to be overbearing, intrusive, or unethical. The GovTech spokesperson added: “The need to protect personal data and preserve privacy are key considerations in the technical implementation of the project.”

Last year the former head of Singapore’s civil service Peter Ong said the country wants to deploy the technology to all 110,000 lampposts in the country.

read more

Singapore to use facial recognition for national digital identity
The country will use biometrics, such as fingerprint, facial and voice recognition, for the new digital identity

Singapore will adopt a centralised biometrics identification system as part of its National Digital Identity (NDI) system.

“We want to extend this biometrics system as a service,” said Kwok Quek Sin, Senior Director of NDI from the Government Technology Agency (GovTech), at a session during the inaugural GovTech STACK Summit. “We will start off with facial recognition,” he added.

GovTech is creating a centralised biometrics system to save users the hassle of repeated enrollments. Citizens will only need to register their biometric information once under the centralised NDI system, and from there on, will no longer need to personally enroll this information for every service.

read more

Singapore to test facial recognition on lampposts

Prime Minister Lee Hsien Loong said last week that the Smart Nation project was aimed at improving people’s lives and that he did not want it done in a way “which is overbearing, which is intrusive, which is unethical”.

The spokesman for GovTech said: “The need to protect personal data and preserve privacy are key considerations in the technical implementation of the project.” The government also hopes to use other sensors on the lamp posts to monitor air quality and water levels, count electric scooters in public places, and collect footfall data to aid urban and transport planning, GovTech said.

GovTech did not say how many lampposts would be used in the initial pilot project. But a former head of Singapore’s civil service, Peter Ong, said last year that the country aims to bring all of its 110,000 lampposts into the sensor network.

read more

More surveillance cameras as deterrent
Measures to boost security will also apply to soft targets like sports facilities and malls, said Mr Shanmugam

The network of closed-circuit television (CCTV) cameras will expand significantly over the next four years, to ramp up surveillance and deter those plotting terror attacks in Singapore.

The Government will also, where necessary, pass laws to require building owners and organisers of major events to step up security, said Home Affairs Minister K. Shanmugam yesterday. In a speech to senior Home Team officials, Mr Shanmugam laid out plans to protect key infrastructure such as government buildings, as well as soft targets like shopping malls and sports facilities.

All 10,000 Housing Board blocks and multi-storey carparks will have police cameras installed by the end of this year, he said.

read more

Surveillance cameras to be installed to monitor high-rise littering


The National Environment Agency (NEA) will install surveillance cameras in places with a persistent high-rise littering problem. Previously, it would have required many hours of stakeouts to catch the offender in action.

NEA said the number of high-rise littering cases rose to 5,232 last year - nearly 700 more than the previous year. The agency has apprehended and prosecuted some 40 cases in the last 10 years.

Offenders of killer litter, or high-rise littering, can face imprisonment, a fine, or both. The Housing Development Board may also compulsorily acquire the HDB flat or terminate the flat tenancy if the killer litter is thrown from any HDB property.

read more

REACHSingapore shared a note. April 19, 2012

High-rise litterbugs, beware! Come August, the National Environment Agency will be installing surveillance cameras in 40 areas with persistent high-rise littering activity, following an effective pilot initiative in 10 locations last year. Residents of affected blocks will be informed prior to the installation, and cameras will only focus on the blocks’ facade. Without the use of technology, nabbing litterbugs in action was previously a labour-intensive task. Last year, 31,126 man hours was spent in enforcement stakeouts and community outreach efforts, resulting in the prosecution of only 8 people.

related: Litterbugs, look out - you can get caught on camera

read more

Will NEA’s high-rise littering surveillance cameras invade my privacy by recording footage of activities inside my home?

The National Environment Agency (NEA) has stepped up on our enforcement efforts against littering to increase the likelihood of catching litterbugs, especially high-rise litterbugs, through the deployment of surveillance cameras. In 2018, NEA deployed cameras at more than 1,000 areas with persistent high-rise littering feedback, and took more than 1,100 enforcement actions against persons caught.

In our deployment of surveillance cameras, we are mindful of residents’ privacy and have put in place precautions. Our enforcement officers will ensure that the surveillance cameras are focused only on the external façade of the housing units being investigated, to capture the act of littering.

As for the handling of the video footage, only authorised NEA staff and the vendor can access to the recording for official purposes. There are strict protocols governing the viewing and copying of the footage, to ensure that the recordings are used only for enforcement against high-rise litterbugs. The video evidence will be shared only for the purpose of court prosecution or to facilitate investigations. Footage that does not show any littering act will be destroyed after three months.

related: Enforcement For Littering Offences Increased By Almost 22 Per Cent In 2018

read more

Singapore is a top hacking nation
But we are also number one in security strategy

Forget about being a Smart nation or a startup country The city-state has made into the podium as one of the top ten attacking countries, based on data from (Threatmap). The website tracks malicious cyber-attacks across the globe and consistently ranked the top aggressors in cyber-attacks. One glance on the list of top ten attacking countries, one will find the great powers of the world pitting each other for glory and honors in the cyberspace.

However, a nation or rather a city-state stood out from the rest of big countries with likes of USA, Russia, UK, Germany and China. Surprise, surprise … the city-state is none other than Singapore. According to Threatmap, the island-nation is placed on the fourth position among the top attacking countries. Singapore has held the same position rather consistently over the past two weeks, which saw almost an average cyber-attacks of 14 million cases over the world daily.

The first place in the hit-list among the Singaporean hackers is reserved for USA and the city-state is likely to inflict its target with tons of malwares. By computation, Singapore’s favorite weapons of choice belongs to access to malicious resources at 61.7%, followed by bot communication at 30.3%, then malicious file transfer at 0.9% and others malwares at 7.1%. Meanwhile, the “numero uno” or first-place among the top attacking countries is conferred to Russia which infects other machines and global networks mostly with bot communications. Ironically, Russia is also placed consistently as the number one target by hackers all over the world.


read more

Smart Nation Vision For Singapore
A new platform, data sensors, trials at JLD and industry collaboration will help Singapore realise its smart nation vision

Singapore is en route to becoming the world’s first smart nation with the introduction of several new initiatives, including a new platform that encompasses the necessary infrastructure and technical architecture to support a smart nation ecosystem.

Unveiled at the opening of the Infocomm Media Business Exchange (imbX) event, these new building blocks are aimed at bringing together policies, people, and technologies in a concerted fashion that will help the country realise its smart nation ambition.

Singapore has made good progress establishing the backbone infrastructure to support big data and analytics, Internet of Things (IoT), and other transformational ICM technologies outlined in its Intelligent Nation Masterplan (iN2015), said Dr Yaacob Ibrahim, Minister for Communications and Information, during his opening address at imbX.

read more

Thursday, 29 August 2019

Is travel insurance really worth it?


We’ve all deliberated this before – do we really need travel insurance? And we’ve all heard the stories from travel insurance companies – what if there’s an emergency? Without travel insurance, it would cost thousands of dollars which could have been covered, if you got insurance.

Is it true? Most of the time our travels go without hiccups. You’ll probably not experience the nightmare of being injured or your family members getting seriously ill in a foreign country. But what if you do? The last thing you want is not having the financial means to get treated and return home, safe and sound.

For that peace of mind and 100% enjoyment on your holidays, insurance is worth every cent. Let’s get down to the 5 reasons you should get travel insurance:
  • To have a real adventure
  • To be ready for anything
  • To save money
  • To care for your family
  • For your health’s sake

read more

Wednesday, 28 August 2019

Guy becomes 'famous' after throwing soiled diaper

You want to be famous? Let's make you famous"

Onto car at Tampines Mall carpark

A man has become 'famous' for the wrong reasons after he was caught on video throwing a soiled diaper onto another car at Tampines Mall's carpark on Aug 24.

Facebook user Jonathan Lee posted a video of the incident after finding the dirty nappy on his vehicle.

In the video, a woman is seen passing the man a plastic bag containing the diaper as he is about to close his car's boot.

read more

Jonathan Lee August 24 at 6:23 PM

Met an inconsiderate driver who threw his child's used diapers onto my car. After doing his deed, he took a 2nd look and realised that I have a rear car cam looking right at his face. If he was wise enough, he would have taken the diaper and threw it away, heck, even if keep in his car and throw when convenient also better then leaving it on other people's car.

If u want to do such disgusting things, make sure no one is around. In this case, ur luck ran out coz u met me. You want to be famous? Let's make u famous.

Update: For those who are in doubt, this happened today (24 Aug) at Tampines Mall carpark.

A report has been made to NEA.


#SJV3941E #dirtybombom

read more

Driver slammed for tossing soiled diaper onto another car at Tampines Mall
Here's one way to get famous on the internet

A driver in Singapore has achieved online notoriety after he was caught on video tossing a soiled diaper onto another car.

The victim, Jonathan Lee, took to Facebook to call out the man for his behaviour, sharing footage that was recorded using his in-car camera. According to Lee, the incident happened on Saturday (Aug 24) at a carpark in Tampines Mall.

In the video, the man had loaded a stroller into the boot of his car before a woman leaned back to pass him a seemingly used diaper. He looked around to check for passers-by but missed the camera pointing directly at him. The man then swiftly threw the diaper onto Lee's car in a smooth backhand movement and made a quick getaway — but not before revealing his face and car license plate for all to see.

read more

INCONSIDERATE MAN CAUGHT ON CAR CAMERA LEAVING SOILED DIAPER ON INNOCENT DRIVER’S CAR
One Man’s Car Is Another Man’s Trashcan

Cars in Singapore are expensive. So, when you return to your car after a nice lunch with your family and find scratches on the sides, it’s not unreasonable to suddenly develop homicidal tendencies.

But what if you find a used diaper on your car? On Saturday (24 August 2019), Jonathan Lee posted a video on Facebook showing a driver in the Tampines Mall carpark leaving a soiled diaper on his car.

The video starts off with the driver placing his baby’s stroller in the boot of his car. A woman in the car, presumably his wife, then hands him a used diaper. The man then closes the boot, looks around suspiciously like a murderer in a movie, and throws the soiled diaper on Lee’s car. Just before he gets into his car, the man turns back and freezes, realizing Lee’s car has a dashboard camera.

read more

S’porean Dad Kantoi On Dashcam Throwing Used Diaper On Car Hood Behind Him

Remember, if you think you can get away with anything these days, think again. We are living in a time where cameras are everywhere. One foul move, no matter how small it is, if a camera is recording you, prepare to land yourself in a shitty situation.

Recently, Jonathan Lee shared a video taken from his car’s dashcam showing a man casually throwing a used diaper onto his car with finesse. According to Jonathan, the incident happened at Tampines Mall at about 1.42pm on 24 August (Saturday).

From the video, you can clearly see the man putting his child’s stroller at the trunk of his vehicle, before a hand, presumably the wife’s, passes him a used diaper for him to discard.

read more

Man Throws Dirty Diaper On Nearby Car And Drives Off; Incident Reported To NEA

Hold a child’s dirty diaper up to someone and they’d immediately pinch their nose and turn away in disgust.

None of us wants to smell, let alone touch soiled diapers, but not to the extent of flinging one away randomly and running off.

Unfortunately, a man allegedly did just that at the Tampines Mall carpark on Saturday (24 Aug). And the victim of the diaper missile was an unlucky car parked just behind his.

read more

Full Coverage:
Caught on cam: S’pore driver tosses used diaper on car parked behind him
Singapore dad caught on video throwing dirty diaper onto another car
Man Throws Dirty Diaper On Car at Tampines Mall; Incident Reported To NEA
Man Caught On Video Throwing Used Diaper On Another Person's Car
Unhygienic S’pore driver casually tosses used diaper on car behind him
Man Becomes Singapore's Online Villain After Being Caught Throwing
Singapore driver slammed for throwing dirty diapers on another car
Driver in Singapore slammed for tossing soiled diaper onto another car
This is high level sc**bag. Throwing diaper on other people's car

Parliament - There’s no stopping Yishun’s sanitary pad litterbug, period

The issue of high-rise littering stirred up a lively exchange in Parliament on Tuesday (Sept 3), with Ms Lee Bee Wah (Nee Soon GRC) throwing light on a peculiar form of high-rise litter that has been a persistent issue in the past few years: soiled sanitary pads.

Ms Lee, who does monthly litter-picking with residents in her constituency, was among a handful of MPs who expressed concern about enforcement actions taken by the National Environment. She pointed out that deploying surveillance cameras for a short period of time hardly addresses the problem.

"There were several high-rise littering of sanitary pads for many years and, until today, it is still not solved. And why? Because NEA deploys CCTV (cameras) only for a few days. And the problem persists," she said. "Actually, if you have...an ambition to catch the culprit, I'm sure we'll be able to catch (him or her)." "Otherwise, (it) looks like this problem will disappear only when the litterbug (enters) menopause."


related:
From Teabags to Soiled Diaper & Sanitary Pad to Killer Litter
KILLER LITTER
Fined for shooting rubber bands in public
Guy becomes 'famous' after throwing soiled diaper

Tuesday, 27 August 2019

10 Foods To Avoid With High Blood Pressure


High blood pressure is a frightening disease because it has few symptoms yet puts people at great risk of heart disease or stroke. Huge numbers of people have been diagnosed (up to 75 million in the United States alone) but many more have hypertension and don’t know it.

High blood pressure is quite manageable with diet and lifestyle changes, so don’t despair if you have been given (or even just suspect) this diagnosis.

Stick with us to learn what you need to do to continue living your best life for many years to come.

read more

Monday, 26 August 2019

No Putting Your Feet On Bus Seats Anymore

Declare New Public Transport Sign
Raise a hand if you’ve ever met passengers on the bus who enjoy the comfort of stretching their legs

Stretching their legs while sitting, making good use of that empty seat opposite, that is.

Well, it looks like bus operators are aware of how ungracious bus passengers can be. And they’re already making an effort to discourage such behaviour.

Last Saturday (17 Aug), a Redditor noticed a new sign on a bus officially banning the act. The picture was uploaded with the caption “So SMRT has finally had enough.”

read more

Excuse me, seats on public transport are not for your legs or luggage
From time to time, seats on public transport are occupied by something out of the ordinary, from legs to luggage

Stomper Anonymous shared a photo with us of a teenager who had her legs up on a seat in a train. She witnessed the scene on Monday (July 8) at about 5.30pm when she boarded a train towards Punggol at Outram Park.

She said to Stomp:
  • "I was on the way home with my friend and thought about why they were behaving so indecently in the train.
  • "It felt like they were treating the space as their home.
  • "I usually don't take photos but this was over the limit."

read more

Shots of commuters putting their feet on bus seats next to warning signs go viral

It should already be common sense, but in case anyone’s struggling with the logic, putting your feet up on bus seats is considered A Rude Thing To Do.

Not only is it unhygienic (imagine sitting on the filth you might have stepped on), it also blocks other passengers from getting a seat. And no, it doesn’t matter whether the bus is empty — it’s just inconsiderate for everyone else when chairs get dirtied up.

Unfortunately, courtesy and graciousness aren't coming naturally to everyone. Last month, SMRT started putting up signs on buses that explicitly discourage commuters from stretching their legs onto seats opposite them.

read more


Inconsiderate passenger airs her feet on bus seat
Stomper Slc was disgusted when she saw a fellow commuter airing her feet on another bus seat yesterday (June 13)

The Stomper sent in a photo to Stomp showing the lady resting her bare feet on another bus seat with her shoes placed on the floor.

Slc was outraged and commented on the situation:

"Such disgusting and inconsiderate behaviour on bus service 141.

read more

All Singapore Stuff May 16


Some people think they pay bus fare means their feet and barang barang also deserve a seat on the bus.

read more

QUEEN OF SBS BUS SPOTTED!

Spotted today as I was taking a bus, this queen of the SBS bus happily sitting, putting her feet up, and taking the seat next to her as well with her bags.

Granted, the bus might not be that full, but do you really need to put your feet up like that? This is a public bus, you should show some courtesy by not treating this as your home! Wonder what's her excuse?

Too tired after walking too much? But it was early in the morning! Maybe it is true, nowadays, there are more and more selfish people around.

read more

S’pore man uploads video of teens putting their legs on bus seats, challenges netizens criticising him to MMA fight

Some people take their duties of uploading videos to highlight anti-social behaviour seriously.

On Dec. 24, a video uploaded by Facebook user Joo Wee, showed three youths putting up their feet on seats in what looks to be an empty bus.

It was accompanied with the caption “3 stupid young punks on bus”.

read more

related:
No Putting Your Feet On Bus Seats Anymore
'No Eating and Drinking' MRT Rule Begone!
Woman defends decision to breastfeed on MRT train
Immodest Anti-Social Behaviours
Full Monty SG Style
Strange & inappropriate behaviour on public transport

Sunday, 25 August 2019

The Ice Queen Personality

Definitions:
  • A woman who lacks the ability to empathize or put herself in "another's shoes".
  • A woman who lacks the ability or chooses not to effectively define or react to another's mode of thought and mood.
  • A woman who is so OVERLY concerned with her situation that she does not prioritize or account for another's needs.
  • A woman who lacks empathy in situations where a another's needs are clearly greater than her wants.
Quotations:
  • You arrive late to dinner because you were in a car accident. After explaining your situation, the ice queen yells at you for being late.
  • The ice queen's cold personality trait may stem from a troubled past or a lack of life experience.
  • The ice queen is hard to get along with because she fails to understand people's feelings.

read more

An Example:
  • A man was reading his HP in his computer room, as usual.
  • A woman came into the room to sweep the floor.
  • Man went out of room to continue his HP on the sofa in the living room.
  • But he dozed off after awhile.
  • Woman said in a raised voice which awakened man.
  • "There is a couch in TV room & a mattress upstairs made for you to have your naps. Why must you sleep on the sofa in the living room? Told you this a couple of times before but you are still doing it"
  • Man was silent and remained where he was.
  • After a while, woman returned "Always out to irritate me. In no time, I have to replace the sofa if you keep on sleeping there."
  • Man replied "I did not come here to sleep. I was reading my HP but dozed off, cos I was having Insomnia and had not been sleeping well last few nights. Cannot sleep in peace, wish I were dead. Cannot imagine what if we are living on the 10th storey."
  • Woman "Go ahead, do it! Who is stopping you? Talk only!"
  • Man was bewildered and taken aback on hearing this. He was very sad as it was unbecoming that a person who attends Novena, had just completed a Pilgrimage in Melaka and would be going to another in Poland, could have said that.
  • Man blamed himself for the sudden outburst and predicament. He was very depressed.

What do you call such a person???

An Ice Queen

Conventionally, Ice Queens are physically attractive women with off-putting personalities and repulsive attitudes. They are very narcissistic and have little regard for another’s interests and feelings; they show little or no empathy. Ice Queens exude an air of determination and steely anger beneath the surface, causing others to tread lightly when they are around. From her point of view, you have to be really special before she allows you, often temporary, emotional access. Deep down, however, she is lonely, fearful and compensates with an inflated icy exterior due to an extreme sense of vulnerability.

Ice Queens come in different types. Some are known as ‘Iron Ladies,’ and are usually in high political office where they make a point of showing they are tougher than the rest and are not to be messed with; think Margaret Thatcher. At other times they can be seen as ‘The Baroness’ – ruthless, cold, and demanding. Some other identifying traits include:
  • They cannot, or do not, want to empathise with another person’s experience, point of view, or concerns, no matter how desperate that person is.
  • They come across as disrespectful, cold, unfeeling, and contemptuous of other people.
  • They are chiefly concerned with their preoccupations; their needs and thoughts matter above everything else.

read more

What does it mean to be an ice queen?

People call other people names for all the usual reasons. Cause they're mean, cause they're bullies, or cause they don't get, or don't care, about other people. Ice Queen isn't the most terrible thing you can get called, but why do some people feel that they are allowed to put labels on someone else?

Everyone is different. Unfortunately, introverts tend to get a bit more than their fair share of labels, just because they can't/won't/don't play the social games that extroverts consider a vital part of life.

It could be that this woman is a true introvert, in which case interacting with other people sucks the energy right out of her. Or she may be shy (which is not the same thing). Or she may have other things going on in her life and doesn't have the time or energy to waste on the usual stuff that goes on around campus. She may not be terribly socially adept, so stands to one side and watches what is happening, which some people can take as aloof or stand-offish, or even as judging.

read more

The Ice Queen Phenomenon

I would like to address the Ice Queen phenomenon, as I understand it. My definition of an Ice Queen is a woman who gives the impression of being unfriendly and unreceptive to a man approaching her. Here are my credentials: I've totally been guilty of being the Ice Queen myself, especially in my younger years. I've never been afraid of stubbornly deflecting anyone I felt uneasy about. Then again, at that time I was painfully shy and unhealthily afraid of pretty much everyone. *sigh*

It wasn't that I disliked people. Rather, I lived under the belief that everyone automatically disliked me, for some reason I was blind to. You could easily say I had an inferiority complex. I really wanted to be friends with people, but my biggest fear was of being an annoyance to anyone, so I tried to stay out of everyone's way, would never voice an opposing opinion, and kept from doing anything that might draw attention. My "reasoning" was that people who actually wanted to be friends would naturally make the first move to get to know me. (Although if anyone ever actually did, I was usually suspicious of their motives until I knew enough about them to trust them! Brilliant, right?)

So thus, I had a very difficult time making friends, and was never taught how to act around boys or how to attract any positive attention. Or any attention at all.

read more

Dating an ice queen? Here are 15 crucial things you need to know

An ice queen. The woman that every man is intimidated to approach and every girl looks up to be.

She knows what she wants and isn’t afraid to go and get it. Yes, she appears like a bitch, but there’s much more to it than that:

If you’re dating a bonafide “ice queen”, here are 15 things that you need to keep in mind.
  • Ice queens have usually been hurt….badly
  • Has she told you she likes you? You’d better believe her
  • She doesn’t “need” you
  • She’ll be completely devoted to you
  • She’s crazy in bed
  • She’s emotionally mature
  • She has her own life in lock
  • She doesn’t care what other people think
  • She has built up a huge wall to protect herself
  • She means what she says and says what she means
  • She treats others with genuine kindness
  • She can’t stand small-talk
  • She’s real
  • She has her boundaries
  • She’ll love you like a king

read more

Here’s What You Need To Know About Dating An Ice Queen

I’ve been called an “ice queen” and a mean girl more often than I want to admit. While I do have my mean side, that doesn’t mean I don’t have a sweet side, as well. Many good women I know have been frozen out by guys because of their often brusque demeanors. Before you cast aside the Ice Queen in your life, it’s important to realize the following things:
  • ICE QUEENS HAVE BEEN HURT. BADLY
  • STILL WATERS RUN DEEP
  • WE BUILD UP WALLS TO PROTECT OURSELVES
  • AT TIMES, WE REALLY DON’T MEAN TO BE MEAN
  • ICE QUEENS CAN MAKE VERY DEVOTED GIRLFRIENDS
  • WE’RE CAPABLE OF HOLDING OUR OWN
  • WE’LL ALWAYS BE A CHASE
  • WHEN OUR ICE QUEEN SIDE MELTS, WE’LL GO TO THE ENDS OF THE WORLD FOR YOU
  • WE’RE THE KIND OF CATCH THAT WILL WOW OTHER PEOPLE

read more

Cold People: What Makes Them That Way?

Doubtless, you've had the experience of interacting with someone who was, we'll say, off-puttingly stand-offish. Detached, seemingly preoccupied, and not at all open or friendly, they seemed to hold you at a distance. And if you tried to say something to ease the situation, their response (though not exactly inappropriate) pretty much nullified your efforts.

Or, you may have begun a romantic relationship that started out promising, but over time compelled you to confront the fact that the other person really wasn't letting you in. Despite all your attempts to "grow" the connection, to make it more mutual and heartfelt, he or she seemed to prefer that it remain as it began—uncommitted, relatively superficial, and impersonal. Any natural progression toward greater intimacy (at least emotional intimacy) simply wasn't happening. And trying to cultivate more patience, to cut the other person more slack, or make allowances for their perhaps having an especially "private" nature, ultimately didn't seem to make any difference in your feeling uncomfortably removed from them.

Hopefully, this is a relationship you walked away from. Odds are that in both cases I've portrayed, you were dealing with a person who might best be understood as having what in developmental psychology is called an avoidant attachment pattern. This most useful concept—introduced into the literature by Mary Ainsworth who, along with her mentor, John Bowlby, represent the chief pioneers in the vital field of attachment theory—focuses on the nature of children's attachment to their earliest caregiver as it crucially shapes how they'll relate to others later in life.

read more

How to Truly Forgive Someone And Let Go
THE POWER OF FORGIVENESS – AND WHY IT’S HARD

The act of forgiveness may just be the single most powerful antidote for the pain caused by others.

Forgiveness does not mean that you “forget it and move on.” Nor does forgiveness mean that you absolve the person of their actions.

Forgiveness, instead, is choosing to compassionately release the desire to punish someone or yourself for an offense.

read more

What Percentage Ice Queen Are You?

It’s time to finally discover how icy your heart truly is.

When is the last time you cried?
  • This morning – I saw a cute puppy.
  • Yesterday.
  • This week.
  • I genuinely can’t recall.
Let’s be honest – we all have a little bit of Ice Queen in us, which is why you’re going to need to see The Huntsman

read more

related:
The Ice Queen Personality
How to Truly Forgive Someone And Let Go
8 Reasons Some People Don’t Like You
11 Types of Toxic People Who Surely Poison Your Life
8 Types of Toxic People Who Will Rob You of Your Happiness
8 Types of Toxic People Who Poison Your Life