Reunion dinner is supposed to bring everyone in the family harmoniously together, but for some reasons or other, not following the tradition, is causing tensions among families. This is especially so if one is celebrating his/her reunion with his/her parents as well as with the in-laws. It is therefore not surprising that one would have reunion dinners on a different earlier dates and nowadays, some hold it a week or two before the actual day. By doing so, the traditionalists believe that the Chinese New Year's Eve Reunion Dinner is losing or has even lost its meaning and significance.
To keep up with the tradition that Chinese New Year's Eve Reunion Dinner should be held on its actual date, and that married couples should return to man's parental homes, many families are compromising in order to make everybody happy:
- Eating reunion dinner twice, which means having the first dinner early, and then rushing off to do a second dinner by a certain time on the same actual day.
- Alternating the dinners yearly, one year with parent and following year with in-laws.
Meaning of Reunion Dinner
Reunion Dinner 年夜飯 traditionally happens on the eve of Lunar New Year. In today's society, it is unsurprising that one would have reunion dinners on a different date. This is especially so if you are celebrating your reunion with your parents as well as in-laws.
If Chinese New Year was meant to celebrate the coming of the new year, Reunion Dinner would signify the celebration of Family. In these times, families members usually live apart after marriage and setting up of family. Dinner as a family unit would tend to be far and few in between. Reunion dinner would be one of those precious moments where the families can dine as one.
Thus this gives added significance to this day and it had even been recognised as a ' non official - official ' half day for most companies. Given the significance in relation to family, we should seriously consider to petition this day as a holiday in Singapore.
read more
My husband and I are Malaysians but staying in Singapore. Every CNY, we have been celebrating it in his hometown Johor. For the past 10+ years since I married into his family, I have never once celebrated CNY with my family. But 2 years ago because one of my family was very sick till almost died, I decided I should make it a point to go back and celebrate with my family too. So we will drive off on 2nd day of CNY to my hometown up in the north Kedah. Spend 2 days there and drive back to Johor. Rest 1 day and go back Singapore.
But this year because my son has exam on the week after CNY, I cannot allow him to miss school during that week. Hence, I am making him skip school 2 days before CNY to give us the traveling time. Due to this, we need to go up to my hometown first, then come back on 1st day of CNY to Johor and spend the rest of CNY with his family.
Initially, my in laws agreed no problem. But now the so called kaypoh uncles and aunties at my in-laws side cause trouble. They say reunion dinner at the guy's side very important so we cannot have at the girl's side. Come on... what century are they living in?! Can't we even have reunion dinner on 1st day of CNY. They can say my in laws are very old so must spend CNY with them. Does that mean my parents are getting younger??? Furthermore, their own daughter in laws staying in HK and Indonesia never come back to celebrate CNY with them. Only their sons will fly back themselves. And yet they can say other people's family. Why don't they take care of their own family first.
read more
Reunion Dinner
It is a Chinese tradition that when a woman gets married, she'll have reunion dinners at her in-laws'. Outrageously unfair. So what I did after I got married was I'd go to my parents' for a quick dinner, then scoot off to the in-laws.
MIL wasn't happy at first, but I was adamant about my arrangement because with my 2 bros and my sis not around for CNY, it leaves just one bro around with the old folks. I know a lot of battles are fought among couples over the reunion dinner, and if I may, let me suggest that if you live in the same place, try and go to both sides, or have one do lunch and the other dinner. Or, like me, we do a reunion dinner when my sis and family get back from Sandakan. But if you have to come from far, alternate your dinners yearly. How's that?
This year, MIL has relatives from Shanghai and they were in Mulu Caves during the new year eve, so reunion dinner was postponed from the traditional eve to the 1st day. Which meant I could have reunion dinner with my mom and bros, SIL and niece! And since mom's too old to cook, I got to do that in my house. And so we had a simple dinner, bearing in mind that we would be having another the next night.
read more
How Chinese New Year is different for a young S’porean woman after she got married
Since getting married over a year ago, Chinese New Year has changed for me in some ways as compared to my previous 28 years of celebrating CNY as a swinging single.
Here’s how! - Having to eat two times reunion dinners. Especially in Singapore when our families are rather small so it’s hard to just have dinner only at the husband’s side. (Like my parents who have two daughters — if we both eat out, they will end up having reunion dinner with each other. So poor thing.)
So what usually happens is that most couples end up eating reunion dinner twice to make everybody happy, which means having the first dinner really early, usually at 5pm and then having to do a mad cross-country rush to the second dinner by 7pm.
read more
Reunion Dinner - Feasting Together
Traditionally, married daughters are excluded from reunion dinners
Traditionally, children away from home are expected to come back for the dinner. Married daughters will join their husbands and they will return home on the second day of the new year.
In Singapore, (694 km2 / 268 sq mi) nobody lives more than an hour away from another. Married children continue to visit their parents regularly. Given this, the significance of reunion dinner is somewhat reduced to an occasion to feast rather than a time to reunite.
Where possible, parents would want to dine with all their children, son or daughter, married or otherwise. As such, it will not be possible for every family to hold reunion dinner on the eve of the new year. Nowadays, reunion dinner begins a week or two before the actual day.
read more
Why some Chinese Singaporeans do not celebrate Chinese New Year
Ms Jennifer Foo, 20, is unsure if a reunion dinner with her immediate family members is on the cards on the eve of Chinese New Year.
"If it happens, it happens. It didn't happen last year," she says nonchalantly.
The lack of usual must-do reunion dinner plans aside, she adds that there are also no festive goodies in her home.
read more
The Reunion Dinner
If traditions are to be followed, this is especially difficult for the parents of the bride who will have to often accept that their daughter will likely need to have the reunion dinner with her in-laws on the eve of Chinese New Year.
As in my case, I found it necessary to spend a little more time comforting my own parents, especially my mum, as it was clear from her sighs and forlorn looks while discussing our reunion dinner schedule, that she would feel the sting of my absence on the eve of Chinese New Year – the yearly date I would have dinner with her each year prior to marriage.
I learned that it helped to make a phone call to her while at the reunion dinner with my in-laws just to let her know that I am thinking of her.
read more
Why is the Chinese New Year Reunion Dinner so Important?
The Chinese New year is the biggest traditional festival in East Asia. Among the various activities that take place during the festival, reunion dinner is the most important one which many families hold dear. Did you know? The number of ethnic Chinese within China alone, who travel over the Chinese New Year period, are in the hundreds of millions, making it the world’s largest annual human migration.
Here is why the Chinese New Year reunion dinner is so important - Just like how all of us have a Christmas and New Year’s family dinner, the Chinese New year is also a time for families to come together and feast on some authentic Chinese delicacies that are specially made during the festival.
The New Year’s Eve Feast is a mandatory custom and an age-old tradition where families come together to feast on authentic delicacies. The reunion dinner also symbolises a good start to the new year while also bonding the family.
read more
Reunion Dinner
The reunion dinner, also known as Tuán Nián or Wéi Lú, marks a family gathering on the Lunar New Year’s Eve and the Chinese consider it to be the most important part of the celebration.
Children are supposed to return to their families, married couples will go the the male’s relatives (and to the female's relatives on the second day of the festivities).
If a family member couldn't participate in the grand feasting, his or her presence is usually symbolized by placing an empty seat at the banquet.
read more
Reunion dinner
The reunion dinner is an annual feast when family members reaffirm the love and respect that bind them together as a unit. It is known as tuán nián 團年 (also known as wéi lú, 圍爐 meaning "gathering around the family hearth"). Every family member is expected to do his best to return to the family home for the dinner.
Traditionally, all sons return to their parental homes for the occasion. Married daughters share the tables of their husband's families. For this meal, the best food is served in abundance.
This is regardless of whether the family is rich or poor, for the Chinese believe that having plenty of food during tuanyuan would bring the family great material wealth in the new year. Tuanyuan delicacies include abalone soup, chicken, mushrooms, duck, fish, chapchye ("mixed vegetables"), roast pork and steamboat.
read more
